Good morning. I am writing to express my concern at your presense on my wall this morning. While on many occasions I have commented that I wish there was someone at home to welcome me back with rousing applause after I make it to the gym in the morning, I didn’t quite have you in mind. And while I’m sure that wriggling maneuver you were making while waving 300 little arms in the air was surely a gazillipede’s celebratory booty shake and not any sort of prelude to attack, I’d be quite grateful if you did it somewhere else.
Like the Amazon.